Savage Divinity

Chapter 616

There are good days and there are bad days, and then there are days like today, when my open rebellion against the Empire ranks as the second worst event of the day.

I get that trials and tribulations is this worlds whole shtick, but I would appreciate it if we could limit ourselves to one catastrophic mishap at a time. I had yet to even confirm if Dad is still alive before the Peak Expert Wraiths started popping out of the woodwork, led by the Bloody Fucking Confessor himself, and now were dialing things up to twelve with the arrival of an Enemy Divinity, because why the fuck not? Luckily, Jixings lesser beardy isnt a complete moron, only most of one seeing as he finally ordered the Death Corps to stand down. At least I assume he has, since no audible orders were given, but the black-armoured guards have fallen back into formation in front of the command centre, their halberds raised and ready to hurl at Big Poppa Piggy. On Akanais orders, given out loud so all other respective parties can hear, the Sentinels also fall back with me alongside them, dragged by Mom to one corner of the plaza in what I can only imagine is proper Mexican stand-off protocol.

Sentinels in one corner, Death Corps in another, and Big Poppa Piggy makes three, standing in the sky and looking as fat and stupid as I remember.

Okay, fat is being ungenerous, since it does seem like its mostly muscle. Its like if someone took a hulking sumo wrestler and gave his portly figure the chiselled definition of a professional body-builder, which is both remarkable and unsettling at the same time. Standing high above the crowd with his mohawk held high, Zhu Chanzui glances over the gathered crowd in obvious disdain, wholly unconcerned by the fact that he stands alone and unaided in the heart of the Northern Citadel. Hate to say it, but he has the stones, though its hardly surprising considering his record against Divinities. Mahakala died to Chanzui, and while no one really said much about what happened in the extended three versus three match of Divinities, I hold the fat pig responsible for Guan Suos death as well. By my count, that makes the score 2 0 in favour of the pig-man against the Empire, which I suppose earned him the right to be cocky.

What I wouldnt give to have Peace or Unity in hand right now, to deliver a Guided throw or a spring-loaded bullet directly into his fat piggy face. Sure, Muyangs new Spiritual Gun-Spear didnt kill Goujian, which means Big Poppa Piggy would probably shrug off my best hits without even blinking, but Ill never know unless I give it a shot, and I doubt therell ever be a better time than now.

Mostly because theres a better than good chance that we all die here.

Though only felt for an instant, Big Poppa Piggys baleful Aura reminds me of my vulnerability once more before a friendly, bolstering Aura sweeps it away. Since I doubt the beardy Divinity up there would be so kind as to shelter us rebel filth from Chanzuis Aura, it lends credence to my theory that the People have Divinities to spare since I sent Guard Leader away with Lin-Lin, Luo-Luo, and the pets before marching on the command centre. It seemed prudent at the time since I was worried Jixing might try stealing Luo-Luo away in all the chaos and I didnt want my wifey or floofs getting caught in the crossfire. Assuming they found their way out of the Citadel, this also means Ping Ping is safe from discovery and on her way to reunite with Pong Pong out in the bamboo grove, and with a little luck, they might even all make it out of Central ahead of the wave of shit thats about to come crashing down.

Despite the presence of an Enemy Divinity standing in plain sight, long seconds pass without an Imperial Divinity coming out to stand up to him. Pretty sure the incompetent beardy up in the Legates room is also a Divinity, considering he was one of the three such bearded Imperials sitting beside the Legate during that big meeting of Divinities, but between being too slow to save Jixing and too stupid to fixate his anger on the right Enemy, it seems he wants nothing more to do with todays proceedings. Hes not even standing at the window anymore, and while he could just be Concealed, somehow, I doubt it. Hes probably long gone by now, with the body of his dead ward no doubt, off to make excuses and scream rebellion to absolve himself of responsibility. I dont know much about him, but he seems like the type.

If I had to guess, Jixings beardy is probably surnamed Yang, while Shen ZhenWus Chief Beardy is a Liang. I dont really have any proof, only conjecture based on the fact that theyre both willing to play bodyguard for their family successors, and I cant imagine Divinities really need a day job to pay the bills. No idea which Supreme family the third beardy hails from, but much like Yang Beardy upstairs, I havent seen hide nor hair of the mysterious third Divinity since the night Mahakala died.

And now, the culprit who murdered him stands before my eyes, high in the air like a god amongst mortals, both within my reach and wholly untouchable at the same time.

Aint this a sight to inspire, Chanzui says, his voice booming out into the silent Citadel as every man, woman, and child listens with bated breath. Idiots killin idiots in broad daylight, leaving yer enemies free t come and go as they please. Yer almost making it too easy to kill ye all, too easy indeed.

That fucking accent. I hate it, and not just because it brings me back to my time in the mines, but also because its fucking infuriating to listen to. Its like hes speaking around a mouthful of shit that he keeps sloshing around in his cheeks for flavour, and it makes me want to slap him upside the head and kick his goddamned teeth in so I dont have to listen to his drawl anymore.

Okay, maybe its not just the accent that bothers me and I have unresolved anger issues, but still, my point stands.

With no rebuttal forthcoming, the Ancestral Piggy takes this as an invitation to monologue. Foolish mortals, going about yer pointless lives and petty squabbles while death hangs over the horizon. You think yer Wall will protect you? You think yer Emperor will keep you safe? Yer Western brethren thought the same, and now they march under our banner, bearing sword and spear in the name of the Truth. Ye call us Defiled and believe we have fallen, but what ye dont know, what ye cannot comprehend, is that youve all been lied to. You who were born to be wolves have been made into sheep, all so those who put themselves above ye can keep playin at bein dragons.

...Hes not wrong, but I dont like agreeing with him on basic principle. Sick of listening to his bullshit, I speak up before anyone has a chance to stop me. Oh please. Every eye in the plaza turns towards me, but I raise mine to meet Chanzuis, staring down my most hated enemy for the first time ever. Ive seen him before, but this is the first time weve come face to face, and from what I can tell, he seems more amused by my interruption than anything else. Ignoring Mom and Akanais Sent warnings, I steady my nerves and pray my voice doesnt tremble too much as I retort, And I suppose youre here to tell us how life will be better under your boot? Under the heel of the Defiled?

Poppa Piggys rumbling chuckles hit me like a jackhammer to the chest as he stares down at me from on high. And when did I say that? His hateful sneer fills me with unbridled rage, and only Moms steely grip around my bicep keeps me from stepping out in front of the Sentinels guarding me. Might not be the smartest move advancing on a Divinity, but if Big Piggy wants me dead, I doubt my guards could stop him. As far as I can tell, most of the damage done during a battle between Divinities is ancillary, meaning Id probably die to collateral damage even if a friendly Divinity blocks the direct attack itself. As evidenced by Jixings beardy, its much easier to kill than it is to protect, and even the shock-waves generated by the battle between Han BoHai and the Confessor was enough to make me spit blood, leaving me feeling like Ive been through eight rounds of a boxing match despite having done nothing but watch from the sidelines. Battles between Peak Experts are nothing to sneeze at, and I keep having to re-evaluate what I know every time I see one up close.

Seeing no answer is forthcoming, Poppa Piggy shakes his head and smiles. I aint here tah coddle ye and tell ye things will be okay, or to win ye over and weaken the Empire more than it already is. No, theres no need for any tiresome tricks and strategies, no point in pandering to politics or popularity. A bloody reckoning is a coming, and yere all unfortunate enough to be standing in the way. Thats all this is, and its what yer Emperor wont tell ye, but whether yer all fractured or united, it wouldnt make a difference either way. Even if ye all fucked off back to yer provinces right now, wed still come for ye all after settlin accounts with them Eastern Imperials. North, South, or Central, well come a knockin when its time, so just you wait. Dismissing me with a snort, he addresses the Citadel inhabitants once more, preaching from on high to the lowly mortals below. Yeve all been living too well. Ye got yer Walls and yer armies to keep ye safe, and because of this, the human race has taken a turn fer the worse. Millions of ye are content to live in yer hovels and shanties, payin yer taxes and bendin yer knees like the good little sheep ye are, but them nobles and merchants who lord themselves above ye aint any better than you are. Take away yer clothes and tools, and throw ye into a pit, and yer just two naked humans with nothing but tooth and fist to rely on. No difference between em sides the circumstances of their births, but since the Empire values bloodlines above merit, they tell ye one is better than the other, even though youd never know by lookin at it.

I hate when my enemies speak logical sense, but I know better than to believe his pleasant words. However, since it seems clear he still has more to say and I am not entirely suicidal, I bite my tongue and put together a rebuttal while Poppa Piggy clenches his fist and carries on. See, ye always hear people sayin might makes right, but in all me years, I aint ever met nobody who lives by it. When I was a youngun, I accepted the Empires rules and lived by them, made connections, did favours, and built up a merchant company to obtain wealth and bought everything my heart might desire. By yer standards, that was how life should be, and there I stood at the top with everything a man might dream of havin, but heres one thing they never tell all ye commoners dreamin of strikin it rich: wealth be as empty and soulless as the coin which represents it. Trials and tribulations, ye all cry, thinkin all yer toil and sufferin will amount to something someday, but most cant even imagine the meaning of true suffering. His wide lips split into a toothy grin as he sweeps his gaze across the plaza, and when he speaks once more, I can feel the conviction in his words and the madness in his mind. But dont ye worry. Yer Grandpa here is fixin to teach ye, and then youll understand. Might makes right, this is the natural order of the world, one we will soon return to after clearing out the chaff and rubble. We are the cleansing fire, the raging tornado, the crashing tsunami, and the toppling earthquake all in one, and nothing will stop us. Not yer walls or yer heroes, and not even yer Emperor and his feeble Divinities.

Tossing a sack down to the stage with a casual flick of his wrist, I hop once to look over the Sentinels in front of me and see whats in the sack. As it rolls unevenly across the stage, I realize it was not a sack, but rather the bloody stump of a head wrapped in its own hair. By pure happenstance, I get a clear glimpse of the face during my brief hop and my breath catches in my throat as I come face to face with Chief Beardy, who I last saw only minutes before the super Wraiths attacked Shen ZhenWu.

Threats and posturing, the Legate said. We know their Divinities wont attack. Shows how much he knows. I really hope the Imperial Clan has more than three Divinities, because otherwise, were straight up fucked. Rest in peace Chief Beardy, whose name I never learned, but in my defence, you spent almost all your time Concealed, so I never really knew if you were there.

This marks three Divinities this Granddaddy has killed in this past year alone, Zhu Chanzui brags, pounding his chest with pride. And this is what might makes right looks like, how life was meant to be lived. The weak die, and the strong survive, that is the True Path we all must follow. You need something? Then take it or die trying. You want something? Then you best be strong enough to keep it. Thats how things should be, because only through conflict and competition can we progress along the Path. We who seek the Truth have come to challenge you, and thus far, your defenders have been found wanting.

Well fuck. So not only is Poppa Piggy strong as hell, hes also a bat-shit believer of Zhen Shis teachings. Problem is, now the entire Citadel knows weve lost three Divinities since the war began, all dead at the hands of one crazed Ancestral Beast. There is nothing to debate here, no room for reason, because he has not come to cajole or convince us that his way is right. No, hes here to give his mission statement, to tell us that the world we know is crumbling around us, and that a new world order is coming to replace it.

This isnt a war. This is a Purge, for the Enemy is intent on genocide, and nothing will change his mind.

Knowing this, I ignore Mom and Akanais warnings to keep quiet and ask, So youve said all youve come to say? Struggling not to flinch under his stare, I rethink my choice of words, but I figure its best to keep the message short and sweet so the point gets across. Good. Then kindly fuck off.

Silence ensues as the tension ramps up until I can barely breathe, but I stand tall before the unseen pressure of Poppa Piggys building fury and hold my head up high. So what if he can kill me as easily as crushing an ant? Thats nothing new. Ive been the small fish in this giant ocean since the day I arrived, and I wont let a little thing like the threat of death cow me into submission.

...Oh, who am I kidding? This was a terrible idea. I shouldve listened to Mom and Akanai...

To everyones surprise, Zhu Chanzui does not lash out in rage, but instead throws his head back and howls in unrestrained laughter. Yer a True one, ye are, he says, and panic grips me as I hear the Capital T True in his words and recognize what he means. Looking around to see if anyone else heard it, I belatedly realize hes speaking through Sending rather than broadcasting his words for all to hear. Defiant even in the face of death. Shaking his head, he smiles at me from above, a smile tinged with pity as if Im the crazy one. Ye dont belong here, he Sends, and again, my heart skips a beat, wondering just how much of my past he knows. Yeve seen the Truth, know it in yer bones, but yer upbringing tells ye yer wrong and it tears you up inside. Ye know our way is how things have to be, and youll be much happier once you accept it. Stop struggling and surrender, child. Not to me or the Uniter, but to yer own inner desires. Cast off the shackles of civility and morality and be true to the creature within. Become the Devourer again, the man yer meant to be, not this weakling pretender playing by rules made up by men long dead.

Despite knowing my arguments wont sway him, I decide to voice them anyways because it needs to be said. Might does not make right, I begin, my hated enemys amusement only fuelling my conviction. You are not right by virtue of strength, your strength only allows you to suppress the will of others. If you claim up is down and down is up, does the world upend itself? No, at most, we switch the meaning of the two words under threat of death and the world continues as it is. Up is still up and down is still down, we just call them by different terms now. What has your strength done there? Nothing. Hitting him with my best sneer, I continue, You say humanity has grown weak because we are safe, but just because you say it does not make it true, no matter how strong you might be. I believe humanity is stronger than ever before and poised to surge forward as a whole, but just because I say this, does not make it false, no matter how weak I might be. Personal strength has no bearing on the Truth, for the Truth merely exists as is, for each of us to see and interpret in our own unique ways.

Oddly enough, Zhu Chanzui actually takes the time to consider my words carefully, even repeating parts of it back to himself. The Truth merely exists as is, he says, tasting the words on his tongue and sharing them with the entire Citadel once more. There for each of us to see and interpret. Words to ponder and consider, but some other time. Gesturing at the command centre across from him, Poppa Piggy says, Dont this prove yer logic wrong? Yer father, arrested for a crime he did not commit, all so some brat could, what? Take yer woman? Thats what this is about, aint it? If ye were strong enough, then no one would even think of touchin yer woman.

Yes, but how the fuck does he know this? Also, the fact that hes defending me will probably turn people against me, because why would a Defiled Divinity speak in my defence if I wasnt allied with him? Ugh. Just what I need, more political shit flung my way. Instead of confirming or denying his words, I tackle his argument instead. So the wives of all strong men are faithful? The husbands of strong women eternally devoted? You must not have spent much time in high society, else youd understand how laughable your argument sounds. What happened here was a miscarriage of justice, because where might is master, justice is servant, but flaws in execution does not render the concept of justice worthless.

Bah. Justice. His sneer back in full force, Poppa Piggy spits the word out like an unappetizing morsel. Honour. Integrity. False concepts created by bored humans sitting safe and happy in their luxurious homes. They had no obstacles or adversities to overcome, so they manufactured their own. A man must behave honourably the nobles say, while robbing their peasants blind. A man must have integrity, claims the merchant, while cheating clients and country alike. So too with justice. Rules fer the peasants, but different rules fer the Warriors, special rules they themselves dont even adhere to. Where is honour, integrity, and justice in nature? Does the wolf challenge the bull to single combat and set a time and date for their duel? Does the fox leave the chickens nest untouched when the dog falls asleep guarding it? Does the rabbit demand justice from the tiger which ate its mate? Dont talk to me about justice, because it doesnt exist in nature.

Youre right. Judging by the sharp intake of breaths echoing around me, I probably shouldve led with something else, but its too late for regrets now. Justice, honour, and integrity are concepts created by humans, which is what makes them worth aspiring to. At some point, Mom let go of my arm and left me free to pace about, but shes still there supporting me from the side. Same with Akanai, looming behind me, her mere presence reminding me there are always taller shoulders to bear the Heavens and lending me courage to speak my mind. I only wish Dad were here with me too, but I know hell be proud of me when he hears what I said. Might makes right is an unfortunate truth, not a goal to strive for. You would have us return to a time when our ancestors roamed the wilds and only concerned themselves with their daily survival, because you think this will make us strong, but you are wrong. We are not wolves or sheep, bulls or tigers, cranes or dragons, or what have you. We are human, and we are strong because we have human concepts, ones which separate us from animals. My notes come to mind, and I pause to think back on the deceased Chief Beardys warning, to refrain from making my observations public, but here and now, his words ring false. No, theres another reason he wanted me to keep silent, something which had to do with his guarded stance and flat out refusal to approach me, to the point where he threw my notes rather than handing them over.

He, a grand Divinity, was wary of me, a crippled boy, someone he could have killed without breaking a sweat, all because of what he read in my notes.

So do I share what I just came up with to refute Zhu Chanzui and risk ruining the faith of the Sentinels around me? Or do I keep it to myself and move on?

Rather than one or the other, I pick a third option and skirt around my newfangled Truth to let others come to their own decisions. Humans are far from the strongest creatures in this world, but we have conquered it nonetheless. We do not live in fear of the wolf and tiger, they live in fear of us. We have tamed the horse and bull, run off the fox and rabbit, spread our people far and wide across the lands not in spite of our weakness, but because of it. We alone are weak, but united as one, we are an unstoppable force, one which can only be threatened by another just like it. This time, its my turn to shake my head at Zhu Chanzui, and it feels good. You say the True Path is might makes right, that the weak die and the strong survive. Well the Defiled have followed your True Path since before the Empires founding, yet it is only now, after who knows how many millennia have passed, that they finally pose a true threat. Why? Because they were recently united under one leader, who pushed all the Defiled to work towards one goal. That is humanitys strength, unity, not conflict, and your own people prove it.

Which is also why so many Spiritual Beasts turn into Ancestral Beasts. Because they too are seeking the human Path, to live in harmony with others around them and aspire to noble ideals like honour, justice and integrity, for these human concepts are what will ultimately elevate us to the Divine.

I dont know how or why, but I just know this is Humanitys Path, a different Path from the one Ping Ping and Pong Pong follow, but a viable path nonetheless, because all Paths lead to the Dao.

Since Poppa Piggy doesnt seem ready to speak, I hammer my point home. My fathers arrest was a gross injustice, and I came here to demand it be righted. Whether they agree that my father is innocent is another story, but every person in the Citadel can understand how I feel and empathize with why I would want his name cleared and to see justice served. If you cannot understand, then you still have much to learn about being human, but I would expect as much from a monster who sells his children into slavery.

That last bit garners a reaction from Poppa Piggy, and again, its not one I expected. Confusion as to why I would bring his children into this, because he truly doesnt understand why it matters, and that saddens me. Guan Suo had parents to teach him what it meant to be human, but I dont think Zhu Chanzui was ever so fortunate. I cannot imagine the events and experiences that shaped him into the person hes become today, and I dont want to know, because even if redemption is not out of his reach, I do not care to help him find it.

Because I am human, and I am vengeful, so I will see him dead.

Anger rises in my chest as I struggle to contain it, until it occurs to me that theres no point in doing so. Embracing the torrent of emotions surging through me, I parse through them one at a time to experience them in full. Pity for Zhu Chanzui, but not much, because he is unrepentant and does not care to improve because he believes he is right. Hatred too, not just because his trading company enslaved me, but also because my father is still in danger, and Im stuck wasting time with this fat bastard instead of storming the command centre to save the man who gave me everything. Impatience, because I wish to be done with this, and anxiety over Dads unknown fate, as he has yet to inform anyone regarding his status, which is not at all like him. So, as I said before, if youve said all youve come to say, then please kindly fuck off, because I have more important matters to attend to and cant be bothered with you anymore.

And finally, Zhu Chanzuis good natured cheer dissipates to reveal the monster hidden underneath. Ye have a way with words, boy, Ill give ye that, but dont mistake my curiosity for benevolence. Ye amuse me, but not enough to put up with yer insolence.

Benevolence and insolence, two more human concepts. Shrugging, I ask, Why should it matter if I am insolent if might makes right? Shouldnt you just kill me to prove me wrong? Except doing so wouldnt prove shit. Id be dead and youd still be wrong, even if you delude yourself into believing otherwise. Another human concept by the way, self-deception. You should rethink your Truth, because from where I stand, its full of holes. Waiting a beat to see if he has anything to say, I cock my head and ask, So? What will it be? Are you going to kill me, or are you going to leave and stop wasting my time?

Stop. Taunting. The Divinity. Akanais Sending is almost word for word and beat for beat the same as Moms, while Yuzhen and Binesi offer a similar Sending in Common. There are a few more panicked messages much to the same effect, Sent by scared Warriors fearful I might goad Zhu Chanzui into destroying the Citadel, but I dont think he will. Sure, he can kill me and probably flatten everyone in a hundred kilometres in the process, but he wont survive it. There are Imperial Divinities watching from the sidelines, ready to strike the moment he presents an opening, and while his presence here is all but daring them to attack, he also knows hes safe so long as he doesnt do anything drastic, like destroying the Citadel. Divinities are all walking nukes, and as such, need to tread carefully, lest they accidentally turn the entire world into a barely habitable wasteland.

Plus, at the end of the day, something tells me Big Poppa Piggy is selfish to the extreme and cares only about his own needs and desires. Working with the Defiled is a matter of shared goals, not an altruistic pursuit, so he would never trade his life for the life of a worthless crippled human, nor would he sacrifice himself to deal a grievous blow to the Empire. He came here to gloat and scare us a bit, but I will not be cowed, because despite his loose adherence to the Treaty, hes more than happy to take advantage of its terms whenever it suits him.

And if Im wrong, then the Peoples Divinities will exact bloody retribution, and Im okay with that, because spite is another human concept I am happy to indulge in.

Looming closer, but not too close, Poppa Piggy flashes a smile to hide his glare, but I see through him. The crippled Minister of Finance, standing up to a Divinity. How brave and courageous. Tone dripping with sarcasm, which is yet another human concept, he looks me up and down in mock admiration. How far yeve come from yer days in the mines. Grin widening as he watches me freeze up, he savours the moment and takes in everyones reactions before continuing. An inspiring story, one which should be shared with all. See, some of ye might remember a little tussle he had with my merchant house in Nan Ping. Set his Divine Turtle to wreck the place and exposed my dealings with my new allies. Highly inconvenient, since there was still work to be done, and I wanted to know why a little northern savage would have it out for my company, so I looked into it and found that this wasnt my first tussle with the People. Grinning from ear to ear in genuine glee, he holds his hands out wide and addresses the crowd. Turns out, one of my ventures up north purchased a slave almost ten years ago, a child of twelve with amber eyes. Because of this, someone sent a Captain to rescue that amber-eyed slave and slaughtered all the other slaves and guards in the process. By sheer happenstance, one of my merchants escaped and brought word that Captain Baatar of the People was responsible for the slaughter, and when I learned that, I realized Falling Rain is likely that slave he rescued. What a touching story, dont you all think? From slave to Minister of Finance, how admirable.

Already I can hear the gasps and whispers, feel the stares and judgment settling down on me. Mom and Akanai each put a hand on my shoulder, and I take a deep breath to calm my nerves. I have thought of this day for years, wondered what would happen if this secret ever got out. In the Empire, being a slave was a mark of shame, one which can never be erased, but while Ive had nightmares of being cast out from proper society due to my past, now that its been revealed, all I feel is relief.

Because I am not ashamed, and now, I can finally speak freely about what I went through.

Meeting Poppa Piggys eyes, I can tell hes startled by what he sees, not fear, panic, hatred, or anything else he might have expected, but cold, uncaring indifference. Yes, I say, ignoring Yuzhens Sent advice to deny everything. I was that slave, a common boy of twelve years. In the mines, I worked ferrying stones and ores to the wagons from sun-up to sun-down. I was beaten, tortured, starved, and denied any and all basic human decency, as well as forced to watch other slaves beaten and tortured to death daily, all as part of some sick, unholy experiment you were conducting to create some Defiled concoction. I suffered, and I endured, until the day my sister found me and brought me to my father, who righted the wrongs done to me and brought me home to heal.

Turning away from the pig, I turn to face the Sentinels around me. The People took me in as one of their own, and for that, I will forever be grateful. Some of those familiar faces already knew, but most did not, and it gladdens me to see more sympathy than scorn, though the latter does exist. There are Imperial soldiers around too, but most seem more perplexed than anything, as if wondering how this could even be possible. I was once a slave, Sentinel, Warrant Officer, and Number One Talent of the Empire. I am now a cripple with a shattered Core and the Minister of Finance, but that does not change my past, nor am I ashamed of it, because those were the trials and tribulations set for me, and I am that much stronger for it. As much as I want to go into a rant on the evils of slavery, now is not really the time, so I turn back to Poppa Piggy with a mocking smile. As for you, you should really stop contradicting yourself. If might makes right, all you need to do is defeat us on the field of battle, yet here you stand, bragging about your accomplishments to scare us and playing mind games to turn us against one another. Killed three Divinities? Perhaps, but you and I both know you did not win by virtue of strength alone. Waving a hand in clear dismissal, I add, Now for the third time and final time, fuck off. There will be a day when I come calling to right the wrongs youve committed, but that day is not today.

Even as I say it, I realize Ive gone too far, because I just outright threatened a Divinity, and even the most modest warrior would see this as a challenge. The air thickens as Zhu Chanzui radiates threat and violence from every pore on his body, a living, breathing engine of destruction on the cusp of losing control. Enough of yer disrespect, he snarls, each word shaking me to the bone. The world ripples as he clenches his fists in rage, like twin Demons being born in the palm of his hands without the unsettling vortex of Spectres around him. Ye think you know suffering? Ill show ye

Big Poppa Piggys ravings cut off mid-rant as a globe of water explodes in his face and sends his bulky form careening away. Crossing dozens of meters in the blink of an eye, he regains his footing up in the air and snarls again, his flesh unblemished but his robes shredded and hair in disarray. Show yerself! Ye think I wont kill eve

Again, the all-powerful Divinity is cut off mid-sentence by an exploding ball of water, but this time, it only rocks him back on his heels. Following the attack back to its origin, his expression flickers between shock and dismay, or perhaps even a bit of fear, for the Divinity who stands against him, does so on four, stubby, leathery legs.

There Ping Ping stands in all her diminutive Divine majesty, her stomach lowered, shoulders squared, neck cocked, and beak wide open in what Ive been calling siege-mode. Its even more adorable now than it was before, and while her attacks dont seem to be injuring her opponent, he does seem unwilling to fight back, and soon disappears without uttering another word. Not sure why, but Im guessing it has to do with the fact that Ping Ping is an Animal Divinity whose strength is unknown and her actions are unrestricted by the Treaty or just morality in general. Unlike me, a man who has died before and is all too willing to risk the hundred or so years of lifespan he has left, Zhu Chanzui is not so inclined to risk his life on a whim, a life which may still have millennia left to live.

In short, he has so much more to lose than I do, which is why I was so willing to play chicken. Ping Ping showing up to save the day is nice and all, but I almost wish she didnt, because now, the turtles out of the bag and I have no idea how Ill keep her safe.

Regardless of the future, theres one thing that needs to be done. Good girl, I croon, patting her head and not using her name just so I have plausible deniability. Divine Turtle? No, this is another, different powerful turtle. Maybe thatll work.

Oh wait.

There are two things I need to do.

Scooping the sweet girl into my arms, I hug her tight as she keeps careful watch for danger and turn to Mom. Come on. Lets go see Dad and make sure hes okay, then we should decide what well do next. Walking to the stage with head held high, I keep a close eye on the upper rooms and pray that idiot Divinity tries to stop me, but no argument is forthcoming and the Death Corps let me pass without a fuss.

Smart move on his part, because, Im done playing politics. From now on, I will walk softly and carry a Divine Turtle, because Im young, dumb, and not afraid to die.

...

Im not a huge fan of that tagline, but if the shoe fits...

Chapter Meme